Chapter 10

“Jon, I don’t have time for this right now, I told the boys you would take them to dinner tomorrow night. I’ll see you then.” Dot said standing her ground.

“No Dot we need to talk now. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Fine, come in.” Dot said moving aside and letting him into the foyer, where he spent so much time.

“Can we go somewhere where we can talk? Maybe somewhere where we won’t be overheard?”

“You’re brothers are upstairs with Gabriella, why don’t you go join them,” Dot said to Steph not breaking her eye contact with Jon. When Steph didn’t move Dot continued with a simple, “Stephanie please, go upstairs.”

Jon walked over to his daughter. “Go ahead upstairs. I’m gonna need some space.” She nodded and gave him a kiss on the cheek as she left.

“Come on we can talk in the kitchen,” Dot said leaving the foyer, before her daughter was up the stairs.

After Jon watched his daughter go all the way up the stairs he followed, even though he knew the way to the kitchen. That was one of the few rooms he had been in. She made sure to keep her space her own. Other than the kid’s rooms and the kitchen he couldn’t remember being in another room. Dot was already sitting at the table calmly waiting for him to sit, and gestured to one of the empty chairs when he entered.

“What do you want Jon?”

“Look Dot, I’m here giving you the benefit of the doubt, so a little less attitude would be nice. I’m here to talk to you about Steph.”

“What about her?”

“You know I’m trying to talk to you about something serious, and you really don’t seem to care. And I think you know where this is going.”

“Jon you don’t understand, she’s a teenage girl, and every little thing is a crisis. And I have no idea what you’re insinuating.”

“She came to me really upset and she talked to me about a couple of things, that had me really angry. But then I thought to myself, ‘No Dot wouldn’t do that. Not the Dot I’ve known since high school.’ So here I am talking to you, but you’ve got to give me something that shows that you care a little bit.”

“Jon, you have my attention, but if your just gonna play some game, I’ve got other things I could be doing.”

Jon took a deep breath trying to control his temper. “I’m here to get your side of the story since I’ve heard her’s. She told me that she feels uncomfortable living here. Not just because its not her home, but because she doesn’t like living with you. She thinks you hate her.”

“How could you think that Jon?” Dot said getting defensive.

“I don’t think that, and that’s exactly what I told her. But what I think doesn’t matter; it’s my daughter who thinks that her mother hates her. And Dot given what she said, I can see how she would think so. Dot I’m not questioning your love for her, I just want to hear your side so I can see my little girl happy again.”

“It sounds like you already have your mind made up.”

“Dorothea, just listen to me. I’m not here so I don’t know what’s going on. All I’m asking for is your version of what she’s telling me, because I pray to God that it’s not all true. Please just talk to me.” She sighed and nodded. “She said that you treat her different than the boys, and more that just how someone treats boys and girls different. She thinks that she reminds you of me and you’re taking it out on her. She said sometimes when you talk to her you won’t even look at her eyes. She told me you won’t even let her play music in the house. Dot just tell me that she’s exaggerating and I want to believe you. I know the two of you were never close, like we are or like you are with the boys. But this isn’t right Dot and I think you know it.” Jon looked at his ex-wife who was seething, tears forming in her eyes.

“How dare you imply that I would neglect one of my children! I love her just as much as I love those boys, but our relationship is different and it has been strained a little more since we left. She was mad that we left and of course it’s hard for me. I know I should be the adult, but do you know how hard it is to look at her and see your eyes looking back at me? The man that I loved for more than half of my life. How every time she talks to me I see the man that tore my family apart. That her mannerisms are identical to yours, how I’m essentially living with my ex-husband all over again. How I see that she looks at me with resentment for breaking the family up. Me, Jon she thinks this divorce was on me! And how could I let music into the house, when my ex-husband is a rock star known around the world? You don’t think it hurts when I hear your music come on the TV or the radio. How much it hurts to hear a love some you wrote for me 20 years ago?” She said through silent tears, her voice rising to a yell with every word.

“So you’re not even going to deny it?” Jon yelled. “You are her mother, she is your flesh and blood and all you can do is hold a grudge at her because we fell apart. I think if you were to ask our four-year-old he would even tell you that that’s crazy.”

“You think I don’t know that? That I don’t know how petty it sounds? But Jon she hates me, for taking you from her what am I supposed to do. It’s like fighting with you all over again!”

“She’s a 15 year-old girl, not a 45 year-old man. I can’t believe the words coming out of your mouth. When you decided the kids would be better off with you, I didn’t question it because I never for a second questioned your abilities as a mother. But god Dot how could you do this? You made her live with this for over a year, before she broke down and came to me. Do you know how hard that must’ve been for her? You didn’t see how upset she was even thinking the things she told me. You made her do the one thing that I don’t think either of us ever wanted, making our kids choose between us and feel a divided front from us. I don’t know when we stopped being honest with each other Dot.”

“You’re one to talk about honesty!”

“Don’t even go there Dorothea, I know all about Connor and how you’ve been forcing him on my kids without even telling me. I understand that your personal life is none of my business, but when he’s in their lives it is. And when he stays the night. God Dot I couldn’t believe it. Do you know how that’s been eating at Steph? She thinks you’re trying to force a new father on her, and your mad that she doesn’t like him. Is that what this mood with you has been about? Troubles with your new man? That’s not fair to me or the kids.”

“I never meant to replace you, not that I could. You don’t think this has been hard on me? I’ve been with him over a year and I love him I really do. But do you think it isn’t hard for me to get him acquainted to the kids, to ease him into my life and my routines with the kids? Do you think its easy for me to be with someone who isn’t you. Jon you were the only person in 30 years that I’ve been with. Do you think that when he kisses me its easy for me to see your eyes and not his? Do you think it’s easy for him to hold me, or touch my face, and it feels incomplete without the calluses on your fingers? Or how he holds me different that you have all these years? You Jon, you’re the one who I see when were together, and I can’t stop it.”

“Stop it! I don’t need to hear this. We were together a long time, and it’s hard I’m sure, but that doesn’t excuse your behavior. And I don’t know what you think I can do to change that.” She just looked at him. “Steph wants to come live with me and I think, given what you’ve said, it’s a good idea.”

“What she wants to leave? Why?” Dot looked stunned.

“Why? You can’t seriously be asking why. I think you know damn well why! And I don’t think that you can argue with it.” Jon felt his phone in his pocket vibrate. He looked down and saw a new text message from Richie, Haven’t heard from you yet…its been over an hour…should I send in a search party to look for the remains?

“How could you want to take my daughter from me?” Tears continued to run down his ex-wife’s face. His ex-wife who usually showed little emotion.

”Are you kidding this is not a pissing match between the two of us! This isn’t even about us. This is about our daughter, and how she’s miserable and wants to be happy. I don’t think that’s too much to ask for, do you?”

“No, but she cant just live with you.” Dot said a shocked look still on her face.

“Why not? Are you questioning my parenting abilities now?”

“Not your abilities, your availability. That’s why the kids came to live with me in the first place, among other things. And what are gonna tell the boys? Did you think of that?”

“Well I’m home now, and I want to give it a try, if that’s what will make her happy. And we can tell the boys the truth. That Steph presented a good argument, and that she’s 15 and old enough to have some say in this.”

“Well you certainly thought of everything didn’t you? When is she moving out?” Dot asked rising to her feet, pacing about the kitchen.

Jon stood and followed her, “Dot this is not about you and me. She came to me for help and I’m talking to you on her behalf. This seems like it would work out for all involved, based on what you said. Why can’t you see that? You can even get a jump-start on creating a new family.”

She reached over and smacked him harder than she ever had before. “How could you think that I could ever replace what we had? That’s the problem Jon, no one else will ever know me or love me the way you did. But I am trying to move on and there’s nothing wrong with that.”

“I never said there was anything wrong with moving on. I just want to see my daughter happy.”

“Fine, I guess it’s decided then, you can take your daughter. When is she leaving?”

“Dot please don’t be like this. You can’t blame her can you?” Jon said trying to reason with her, but careful in choosing his words as he still felt the sting in his cheek.

“When is she leaving, Jon?”

“We didn’t talk about when, it was just an idea that we were talking about.” She kept her icy stare on him. “Before school starts in two weeks, I would assume she would want.”

“Fine, how about next week, Wednesday?” Dot said.

Shit, Jon thought, of all the weeks he would try to have a social life. “Next week I made plans to go down the shore for a couple days with Richie, but-“

“No. She is not going to spend a week with him.”

“In all fairness Dot you are not in a place to dictate who the kids are to spend time with after the crap you’ve been pulling with Connor.” He saw his ex-wife wince slightly when he said his name. “Especially not someone who the kids have known all their life and someone who has been a brother to me. But if you would have let me finish I was going to say I’ll ask Steph what she wants to do. She can come with me, don’t give me that look, or she can move in later in the week, or I can cancel on Richie. And I’ll talk to the boys tomorrow about everything. ”

“Fine you can let her decide. Just see if you can remember to let me know. And I will talk to the boys. Now I want you out of my house,” Dot said moving towards the hall.

“Look I know you don’t owe me anything but I would hope that you’re not petty enough to make her last week here hell,” Jon pleaded as he followed. He decided to pick his battles carefully, and let go the opportunity to tell the boys himself.

“I want you out.” Dot said wiping her face before she reached the foyer.

“Can I just say goodbye to the kids, before I leave?” Jon asked making his way back to the all too familiar foyer.

“You’ll see the boys for dinner tomorrow. I think 5 o’clock should work,” she said with a hand on the door.

“I’ll just say goodbye to Steph then.” He walked over to the staircase and called for his daughter. Within seconds she appeared and came down the stairs. He watched his ex’s icy stare follow her down each step and into her father’s arms.

“Dot can I have a minute?” His ex-wife didn’t move. “Fine. Ok Steph I’m leaving now, but I’ll be back tomorrow to take the boys to dinner.” His daughter pulled away from him a little to look him in the eye and she looked livid. “Stephie, what’s the matter?”

His daughter leaned over and touched his cheek where he had been slapped, which he assumed was still red. “Are you ok? Is this because of me? Why did you hit him!” She turned to yell at her mother.

“Do not talk to your mother like that! And look I’m ok, I promise. This was my own fault, I said something I shouldn’t have.”

“Are you sure you’re ok, Dad?” He nodded. “Then does that mean that you, ya know?”

“Yes, I did and you can move back home sometime next week if that’s ok with you. I’m going away with Richie Wednesday and Thursday, but if you wanted to move in before then I can cancel on him, no biggie. Or you can come with us, its up to you.”

“Really I can move home? Oh thank you Daddy!” She gave Jon a big hug. “And you can go away I can move back Thursday night or Friday, whichever is easier.”

“Ok Steph, I’ll see you tomorrow when I get the boys. And you can call me anytime. I’ll talk to you later in the week, about all the details.” He gave his daughter a kiss on the forehead. “I love you Stephie.”

“I love you too Dad!” She said and ran up the stairs before he left.

“Bye, Dot.” Jon said trying to be polite, even after all they had said.

“Get out,” Dot said with a scowl, and slammed the door as he was barely out of the house.

Well that could’ve gone a hell of a lot worse, Jon thought walking to his car while rubbing his cheek. As he opened the door and sat down he saw the bright red handprint, she had gotten him good. He shook his head and dialed Richie to tell him the news, as he backed out of the driveway.